15 Quotes about Relationships (that can change your life)

This post gives you advice on life’s most important relationships. You will learn how to be a better friend, lover and family member. It covers counting the cost of a relationship, using wisdom in choosing friends and lovers, and the vital importance of family.

Count the Cost

1. Each relationship nurtures a strength or weakness within you. Mike Murdock

Relationships shape you, they transform you. Every relationship changes Who You Are. Some relationships make you stronger and some make you weaker. If you want to have a happy and successful life you need to identify the relationships that are making you stronger and you need to invest more in them. You also need to identify the relationships that are making you weaker or making your bad habits stronger then you need to either transform the relationship or you must end it. This will determine whether your life goes up or down.

2. Truth is everybody is going to hurt you: you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for. Bob Marley

Even in good relationships, people hurt you; it’s just natural because we’re all humans. We all have our own desires and we are all very incomplete people. Even with the best of intentions we hurt our loved ones, in fact, we often hurt the ones we love far more than we could ever hurt strangers. I love this quote by Bob Marley because it reminds me that relationships always have pain; it is unavoidable. But if I surround myself with people who are worth suffering for then the pain still hurts but I know that there is great meaning in my suffering. Whereas if I suffer for people who are unworthy then my suffering itself is unworthy and meaningless.

3. How people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours. Wayne Dyer

I’m not a True Believer in karma. But I accept the principle that however, people treat you that’s their problem. They’ll get whatever they should get in a moral universe. All I can do is react in the best way possible. The same principle is referred to in the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People which I have reviewed earlier: the idea of owning our response. We cannot control others, we can only control ourselves. The moment of conscience occurs between someone’s action upon you and your reaction to them. Your response and only your response will determine what kind of person you become.

4. There is no love without forgiveness, and there is no forgiveness without love. Bryant H. McGill

Since relationships are full of pain and everybody is going to hurt us, the only way we can keep the relationship going is by forgiving other people for the pain that they caused us. If we cannot forgive then love will die. Yes, your love will die if you cannot forgive. And indeed we must forgive if the other person is worth suffering for.

5. I think there is a price to being alone, and there is a price for being in a relationship. It all depends on which price you want to pay – but none of them are free. Lonny Price

I find this to be a very sobering quote. Whether you are in a relationship or whether you are alone there is a price. Nothing is free. What do you want to pay for? Do you want to pay to be alone or do you want to pay to be in a relationship? Much of that cost is in forgiveness, it’s in acceptance It’s in toleration. These are the price for a loving relationship. But if you are not willing to pay that price then you will live with anger and bitterness and pain and that’s too is a price on your soul. You pay one way or the other; it’s up to you to choose which is more important.

Friends and Lovers

6. God gives us relatives; thank God, we can choose our friends. Addison Mizner

This is a humorous quote but it’s oh so much deeper than that. The benefit of being in a family is that they have to accept you; they have to take care of you. At least that’s what we hope. The advantage of friends is that we can choose who we want to be with, who increased our strengths and minimized our weaknesses; perhaps people who are similar to us, perhaps people we wish to be like. But the opposite side is that many friendships are ephemeral, gossamer wings. Our friends don’t have to like us, and tomorrow they may turn against us. So family must pay a price in toleration. And friendship must pay a price in insecurity. Though there are some friendships which are, in fact, stronger than family bonds.

7. A healthy friendship is one where you share your true feelings without fearing the end of the relationship. It’s also one where you sometimes have to let things that bug you slide. The tough moments will make you wiser about yourself and each other. They will also make you stronger and closer as friends. Rachel Simmons

There are a lot of relationships that are not healthy and we need to recognize these unhealthy relationships and either improve them or abandon them. But there are also very important relationships that are healthy and they make you a better person in the long run, though sometimes this takes a Long time to develop. Where we are afraid of telling the truth to each other, afraid of revealing the truth about ourselves, and then also revealing that we understand the truth of our friends as well. A healthy relationship requires a deep understanding of one another. Yet, this cannot come easily; it can only come through trying times. Nevertheless, this is the way to build true friendships that make you stronger.

8. We don’t develop courage by being happy every day. We develop it by surviving difficult times and challenging adversity. Barbara De Angelis

Few people in their lives decide they want to be more courageous because courage requires overcoming your fear or overcoming great difficulty. Instead, we seek to maximize our fun, increase our pleasure and enjoyment. But the fun life cannot create a strong character and fun-based relationships are easily broken. However, a friendship that survives difficult times, a friendship that can grow during adversity is one that will last forever and this is the kind of relationship that will give each of us courage so that we will no longer be controlled by the things we are afraid of.

9. “Affection is when you see someone’s strengths; love is when you accept someone’s flaws.” One Day

Affection is easy and shallow. It happens whenever we see someone who has something we like, we admire, or we desire. It takes longer to get to know not only somebody’s strengths but their weaknesses as well, especially since we have become so expert in hiding our weaknesses. Typically, if we fall in love, we see someone’s greatest points and we cannot see any flaws at all while we are in this chemical Haze of love. But eventually, the fog in a relationship lifts and we begin to see the truth that the other person is just as flawed and weak as we are but perhaps in different ways. Now is the time for testing. If your love is real, you can accept the other person’s weaknesses, you can accept their flaws. If not, then not.

10. I think for any relationship to be successful, there needs to be loving communication, appreciation, and understanding. Miranda Kerr

Three elements of love include communication, appreciation, and understanding. These are indeed essential to any strong relationship. But that’s not where we start our relationships, there’s often a difficult process to get to such a point. First, we must learn to tolerate the other person’s problems; we must be willing to cooperate, to help the other person reach their desires. And the other person must be willing to do the same thing. Only after helping each other grow stronger can we really develop this communication, this appreciation, and this understanding.

 

Family

11. There is no more lovely, friendly and charming relationship, communion or company than a good marriage. Martin Luther

I’m not sure if there are more poor marriages now or it’s just easier to get out of a poor marriage now. However, since we want good marriages, we must identify the elements of a good marriage which Martin Luther does. And that is the ideal of friendship, of communion, and of enjoying each other’s company. After the desire, The Burning Desire of sex Fades into the background or perhaps sex just becomes an everyday occurrence. Then the relationship can move on to a more stable level based on fellowship and companionship. Many poor marriages are full of passion but they lack that communion, that true friendship, where you put aside your selfish desires and instead seek what is best for the other person.

12. The depth of the love of parents for their children cannot be measured. It is like no other relationship. It exceeds concern for life itself. The love of a parent for a child is continuous and transcends heartbreak and disappointment. James E. Faust

The parent-child relationship is the first relationship that any of us ever experience. And it is a powerful and transformative experience for both the parent and the child. This is why the children of a broken family have such a difficult time in life; the children never truly experience the great love of a parent. A forgotten truth is that children need both the great love of their father and their mother, not one or the other, but both. This child-parents relationship forms the basis for all future relationships in the child’s life as they grow up.

13. I have a wonderful shelter, which is my family. I have a wonderful relationship with my brother and sister; this makes me feel that I know always where I belong. Jose Carreras

Family is a very Sheltering institution and it should be protected and nurtured in our culture and by our government. Not only do we celebrate the relationships of parents with children but brothers and sisters which are also important for growing healthy relationships. Many only-children become a lonely child, often feeling left out by their friends who have larger families. That’s unfortunate today as we live in an age of smaller and smaller families. But regardless of the family we have, we must do our best to make every relationship become as wonderful and nurturing as it can be.

14. “Indifference and neglect often do much more damage than outright dislike.” J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

Few parents will ever openly late dislike their children; even if they secretly do. It’s far more common for parents to neglect their children, to be indifferent, or to just not really care. Offen this is because the parents themselves are undergoing great stress or conflict and their own relationships are very poor. As a teacher, one of the most common things I see is children who come from neglected backgrounds. They act up and act out in the classroom, they desire attention not just from the other classmates but from the teachers. And if those students can’t get positive attention intentionally do bad things so they can get some kind of attention, even though it’s negative. It is very difficult, but important, to help these children learn to channel their relationships and their energy in a positive direction so they become secure and who they are and who they’re with, which is what their family failed to instill.

15. They do not love that do not show their love. William Shakespeare

This may be the most challenging quote of all by Shakespeare. You Must Show Your Love. It’s not enough to just say, “I love you”. What are you doing to prove it? It is said that different people have different Love Languages and they give/seek love differently. Sometimes, we have to compromise on the way that we want to show love, for example, by giving lots of gifts, with the way the other person wants to receive love, for example, by spending lots of quality time together. Regardless of how you do it, do it. People can’t see your heart, they can only see your action, so it is imperative for each one of us to show our love for the people that we feel love for. Conversely, some people don’t know how to show the love that is within them, so we loved ones have to tolerate these poor lovers.

 

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2 Responses

  1. Andrew says:

    I have read through some of the Quotes that you have mentioned and there are some that really strike home.
    “God gives us relatives but you can choose your friends” is one that is very true. I find that I can rely more on some of my friends than some certain family members. Each of these quotes point to a decisive point in relationships and they can be hurtful or cheerful, depending how you interpret them.

    • Peter Barban says:

      Friendship is incredibly important to young people, but it tends to be casual friendship. As we get older, our friendships become fewer, but hopefully more committed. For some people, old friends serve the function of family and we often see this in the movies. I hope you can grow and strengthen both your friendships and your family relationships over time, Andrew.

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